“My Word is Stronger Than Oak.”

One of my favorite movies is Jerry Maguire. Released in 1996, and starring Tom Cruise, we meet Jerry Maguire, a sports agent, who makes a handshake deal with Matt Cushman that he will represent his son playing football. Cushman says that he doesn’t do contracts, but his “word is stronger than oak.” He tells Jerry that he will allow him to represent his son. 

Long story short, Matt does not follow through on his word; his son signs with another agent. This is a tale as old as time. It seems that even written agreements and contracts are frequently broken now and tolerated just to avoid costly litigation. Why is it that seemingly solid business agreements become jelly at the convenience of one party?

When we think of some issues, there is a “right” and a “wrong”. It is wrong to steal, right to be honest, wrong to cheat, right to respect others. But with ethics? It’s a bit more grey. In the case of Jerry Macguire, Matt didn’t necessarily do anything wrong – he did what he thought was best for his son. Before his pen signed the dotted line, he could back away, and he did. And he ruined a relationship in the process. 

This is the tricky business of ethics in leadership. We face dilemmas all the time that are in those grey areas. We necessarily make a trade-off when we choose one path in these impossible choices: in the case of Jerry Maguire, Matt Cushman lost a connection in Jerry but gained a connection he believed would make his son successful. 

Our lives, and our business, are filled with these types of choices. We can choose to protect our money, and, in turn, we can lose relationships. We can win a new deal but accidentally isolate a beloved contact. When we put our heads down to craft the perfect presentation, burning the midnight oil, we may forget to network with the young professional who reached out for advice. None of these choices are “wrong” options, per se, but our ethics tells us that often, we should have chosen another course. 

When I worked at Delta Air Lines, where I led Global Talent Acquisition, we embraced the company’s Code of Conduct which was rooted in our core values and culture. Delta Air Lines leadership handled those “grey” areas with deft and honor, and we built a culture that was consistent with doing what is right. We had their own Key to Ethical Decision-Making, where we’d prompt employees that if they were ever in doubt about a course of conduct, to give themselves a “gut check” assessing whether actions aligned with personal values, and what Delta Air Lines believed in. Efforts like these lead teams to take care of our employees and customers, doing the right thing, every time – all the time.

Through the years, I’ve come to think about what is at risk, in this new world we find ourselves in. Does the value of a handshake lose its power? Do we not trust verbal agreements? When we look someone in the eye, can we be sure that they are being straight with us, that they do, indeed, have our best interests at heart? 

In a world that is becoming more technological, and less human, we have the opportunity to answer these questions. We can choose to honor our commitments, to have sympathy and empathy, and rarest of all, reliability. We can decide to honor a handshake, to be good on our word, to work together with others, and to be transparent about what each of us wants, and how we can rely on one another to get there. And the good news is this: ethical leadership is contagious. It sees the grey, the nuance in decisions, as we work to build relationships and businesses that can trust one another again.